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Dinosaur Jr. - Beyond


Dinosaur Jr. - Beyond

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Picture the scene. It is seven in the morning, bleary eyed you awake to the sound of that sodding alarm and stumble out of bed. Gradually getting ready, you switch on the radio. You know it is pretty much a waste of time, but you never know, they might play something decent for a change - just once they might.

DJ: "Hi there music fans, this is Skinny Johnny D your breakfast wake up call here on Shatipol FM, the capitol's favourite radio station."

Oh God, here we go. What rubbish is he going to play now?

DJ: "Later on we shall be playing the latest new RnB smash from Shannyanny called "Baby Look at My Fat Arse". And before I go I promise I will give you a Shatipol exclusive. Yes you will hear Twitney's new single "Septic (I Cut Myself Shaving). But now a message from our sponsors.

As the radio switches to silly jingles advertising anything from hair restorer (Twitney could do with some of that) to holidays in the fleshpots of Ibiza, you begin to wonder why you bother to listen to this crap. Thirty years you have got up every morning and switched on the same radio station. Thirty years you have vowed never again. You have tried other stations but Illusion, Chart Hits FM and Snog FM all play the same boring litany of pop-prats, wailing women claiming to be the latest RnB divas and the most vapid gatherings of post pubescent male pretty boys. Hell, if Fuck This can reform to plague your ears and eyes it'll be the bloody Sour Tarts next. But wait..what's this?

DJ: "..but first we're going to be playing a new single from a band called Dinosaur Juhr, or is that Junior? I don't know, I'm so happy today I can't even think straight. Hey wait a minute! They got the same initials as me - DJ. Ain't that really cool. A band named after me."

Oh, no, he's gonna ruin it. Why doesn't he just shut the fuck up and play the song?

DJ: "Now I know this is not the sort of stuff we normally play, but I guess they paid enough on the payola to get this far so I got to play it. Besides we at Shatipol FM are always prepared to give new acts a chance"

New acts! What is this idiot going on about?

DJ: "So this song is called "Almost Ready"...

I don't believe it. Shatipol FM playing Dinosaur Jr. Well I suppose it is only right. After all, "Almost Ready" is one the most perfect pieces of pure guitar driven pop I have heard in a long time. That hook line is so catchy it just stays with you all day. Mind you, I really like "This Is All I Came to Do" as well. I mean, it is almost as catchy right. But why stop there. I mean the rest of the album is just full of good tunes, ranging from near-emo intense guitar driven rollabout songs to soulful ballads. I could cite half a dozen tracks - I love "Crumble". And what about "Lightning Bulb". What a song? And mustn't forget "What If I Knew". If you're gonna end on a high note then that's the way to do it. Beyond is such a good album I don't see how anyone could not but like it.

DJ: "Well, quite. That was something different wasn't it? Erm, yes. Well that was Dinosaur Juhr for you with "Almost Ready". Can't see that in the charts to be honest, I don't care how much they pay me. And now....Twitney"

Alice! Alice! Are you awake yet? Can you pass me the sick bag?

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